The prettiest little recap podcast you've ever heard.
Rizzoli and Isles fic is hilarious because there is so much of Jane’s mother in it. Theyll be all hot and heavy doing it and…MA!
1. Hanna Marin: Girl Detective
Terrible tailjobs, sparkly trenchcoats, adorable, point blank inquisitions. I want to watch this foreveeeeer.
2. Hanna Marin: Switchboard Gumchewer
Just an hour of zippy banter with Doris.
3. HEY GUYS!: Cece Fake’s Cross Country America
You wanna see the USA with Cece? She just jumps in people’s trunks at rest stops.
4. The Players Club
Paige and Caleb sit around a swanky set and try to seem suave while they play and review video games. Lucas is a frequent guest, he does a segment on indie comics. Toby comes by but he never knows what the fuck they are talking about. He did help build the sets though.
5. Team Sparia
Spencer and Aria are married with 4 kids, 3 of whom play sports at a high competitive level. There are lots of scheduling conflicts and lots of laughs. The 4th kid is an artsy weirdo like Aria who seems to be completely uninterested in sports until season 3 when she starts fucking an adult male archery coach. Aria can’t say shit, Spencer says I’ll give you my blessing if you make the Olympic team. Hijinks ensue while the kids train for gold!
6. Emily Pours Coffee For You.
You the viewer take the place of a patron at the Brew. Emily comes over and pours coffee for you in one of those slouchy off the shoulder sweatshirts that makes it easy to look straight into her cleavage. Sometimes she leans over to wipe down other tables and you can watch her ass. Hour-long. The After Ellen recaps are epic.
7. Morning Drinks with Mama Marin
Crack open a bottle of wine and greet the day with Ashley Marin. She does live test tastes on camera. The other Rosewood moms stop by on occcasion. Spencer’s mom gives legal advice, Mrs. DiLaurentis with OCD cleaning tips, Pam Fields bakes brownies and Ella Montgomery spikes them with pot.
8. Mona Monster INC
Mona gets her own variety show, where talented guest stars perform while she harasses them in a number of ways. Sometimes its texting (which pop up in a big screen behind the guests), sometimes randomly “slimes” people Nickelodeon style. She usually rips off her black hoodie to reveal a stunning frock underneath.
9. The Locker Room
A homoerotic “Undressed” style show where the same sets are used over and over again (the aforementioned ‘Locker Room’ being used every episode) where PLL boys talk about PLL girls and give advice about dating and sex. Lucas’s room is another set, as well as Caleb’s crawl space. Jason DiLaurentis never wears a shirt on this show. Mike would come out on this one, revealing he only loved Mona because he thought she had a cock.
10. Adam Lambert Sings Random Places
PLL scenes are re-filmed with Adam Lambert singing inappropriately and unexpectedly in the background. Examples- Spencer finds Toby’s “body,” Mona reveals her villainous status to Spencer, Hanna and Ashley talk in the prison… the possibilities are endless.
11. Beefcake & Weirdface
It’s more of an infomercial than a real tv show. Holden and Jake spend a half hour hawking their kickbox workout video, showing off kewl moves and sweating through their tight tanktops. It’s a really popular infomercial though. Gay guys at parties are always like, omg, boner alert, Beefcake and Weirdface is on!
I can’t speak for Rose, but I personally am not familiar with either book. I’m always looking for recommendations, so… thanks! I’ll have to add those to my reading list.
I’m actually a big not fan of the books, but I’m willing to admit the trailer probably didn’t do this movie justice. The same can be said for Marie Antoinette, which was a great movie (yay Sofia Coppola!) but the trailer was like a music video. Vampire Academy’s trailer made it look like a promo for a Gossip Girl episode (which, coming from me, isn’t exactly an insult). I was going to give it a chance, but given my proclivity to not see movies in the theater anymore… it’s going to have to wait for DVD. But thank you for recommending it. It means I’m more likely going to make an effort to see it now.
Podcast #58: Shadow Play (S4 E19)
Spencer can keep popping those pills if it gives us this kind of fun ride every week. Nothing will get accomplished but Ali standing in front of a portrait of herself is entertaining enough to watch for another two seasons at least.
Paige is the only person in Rosewood who hasnt lost her goddamned mind. Which she will no doubt be villified for by people who have lost thier goddamed minds and live life by falty assumptions like “i need to deal with other peoples faked death problems.” Unfortunate. I hope she escapes alive to a lesbian paradise college. Emily, feel free to join her when you are ready to enjoy a fulfulling life.